Tag Archives: Parent and Child Relationship

Children: They Learn What They Live

three children sitting on stairs

Photo by Samer Daboul on Pexels.com

Children have always fascinated me. I have been a teacher, coach, camp director, and counselor, etc., for over 30 years. I have seen all kinds of children during that time. There are children who are very well behaved, fun to have around, and a joy to know. Some are quiet, reserved, secluded, and would rather do things by themselves. Still others, are belligerent, disobedient, nasty and mean. It really is a fascinating thing how individuals can have such a variety of personalities, behaviors, and mannerisms.

I have discovered that a majority of the time, the people that are good, wholesome, and well-rounded, have been brought up in a caring, loving, and nurturing family whereas individuals that have been raised in a negative or repressed environment possess the traits that aren’t as likable. Basically, it all comes down to the way a person is raised.

All of this leads me to today’s story.

Many years ago, a woman named Dorothy Law used to write a daily column for one of her local newspapers regarding family matters. One day, she was up against the deadline to get an article into the newspaper and she was short on material, so she created a 14-line poem which dealt with childrearing. It soon took on a life of its own and became a type of guideline millions and millions of parents around the world.  For many, many years after the article was published, it was widely thought that the poem was written anonymously. Dr. Nolte never received credit or compensation and, believe it or not, wasn’t even aware that her writing had grown to the great popularity that it has become, and had forgotten about it. It wasn’t until 1974 that she decided to copyright her poem and later, wrote a best-selling book, “Children Learn What They Live: Parenting to Inspire Values,” along with a co-author, Rachel Harris.

Dr. Dorothy Nolte died in 1988 at the ripe old age of 81, but she left with the world, a timeless poem that will forever serve as a reminder to parents, the importance of raising their children with integrity, character, and thoughtfulness towards others.

It is my hope that you will enjoy this poem and share it with your loved ones.

Children Learn What They Live ~ by Dorothy Law Nolte, Ph.D.

If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.

If children live with hostility, they learn to fight.

If children live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive.

If children live with pity, they learn to feel sorry for themselves.

If children live with ridicule, they learn to feel shy.

If children live with jealousy, they learn to feel envy.

If children live with shame, they learn to feel guilty.

If children live with encouragement, they learn confidence.

If children live with tolerance, they learn patience.

If children live with praise, they learn appreciation.

If children live with acceptance, they learn to love.

If children live with approval, they learn to like themselves.

If children live with recognition, they learn it is good to have a goal.

If children live with sharing, they learn generosity.

If children live with honesty, they learn truthfulness.

If children live with fairness, they learn justice.

If children live with kindness and consideration, they learn respect.

If children live with security, they learn to have faith in themselves and in those about

them.

If children live with friendliness, they learn the world is a nice place in which to live.

 

As a parent…what will you do? If you are NOT a parent, how will you treat others?

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The Mother Who Became A Hero

I have always found that the power of words and what people say to other individuals, a fascinating thing. We all know how much words can affect people…whether they be good or bad…we all need to watch and be careful what we say. Sometimes words that are spoken wrongly, can hurt or crush a soul, while transversely, words that are vocalized in a positive manner, can uplift and encourage a person…sometimes more than they could ever imagine.

Thomas Edison

Photo Credit: Unknown

Such is a story that I found on the web site, The Meta Picture.com It a story about a mother who changed her son’s life forever. The son later became a famous American inventor and enjoyed world-wide fame. This is a great lesson about the power of words.

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One day, when Thomas Edison was just a boy, he came home after school one day and gave a paper to his mother. He told her, “My teacher gave this paper to me and told me to only give it to my mother.”

His mother’s eyes were tearful as she read the letter out loud to her child: “Your son is a genius. This school is too small for him and doesn’t have enough good teachers to teach and train him. Please teach him yourself.”

Several years later, after Edison’s mother died and he was now one of the greatest inventors of the century, Thomas was looking through some old family things when he came across a folded paper in the corner of a drawer in a desk. He took it and opened it up. On the paper it read: “Your son is addled (mentally ill). We won’t let him come to school anymore.

Edison cried and cried for hours and then he wrote in his diary: “Thomas Alva Edison was an addled child that, by a hero mother, became the genius of the century.”

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One of Life’s Highest Honors

Thomas Leuthard

Photo Credit: Thomas Leuthard via CC Flickr

It was once said that the reason that humans are put into this world is to help and encourage others. Think about it. What makes you the happiest? When you are receiving something or getting something?

 The most important things in life aren’t the things that you can see…like money, houses, boats, clothes, etc. The things in life that REALLY matter and have infinite meaning to people, are the things that are priceless and unseen such as kindness, love, thoughtfulness, etc….ways that you TREAT others.

 Today’s short story is a great example of the ULTIMATE way that a person can repay someone with kindness and goodness.

A son took his father to a restaurant for an evening dinner.

The father, being very old and weak, while he was eating, dropped food and his shirt and pants. Other diners watched him in disgust and revulsion while his son was calm and enjoyed hit time with his dad.

After they were finished eating, the son, who wasn’t embarrassed at all, quietly took his father to the washroom, wiped off the food particles, removed the stains, combed his hair and fitted his glasses firmly. When they came back out, the entire restaurant was watching them in dead silence, not able to grasp how someone could embarrass themselves publicly like that.

The son settled the bill and started leaving with his father.

At that time, an old man sitting among the diners called out to the son and asked him, “Don’t you think that you have left something behind?”

The son replied, “No sir, I haven’t.”

The old man retorted, “Yes, you have! You have left a lesson for every son…and hope for every father.”

The restaurant was silent.

To care for those who once cared for us, is one of life’s highest honors!

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Taming the Foolish Child

Photo Credit: Tim Oiler via CC Flickr

Photo Credit: Tim Oiler via CC Flickr

A little while ago, I came across a great story told by Rudy Ruettiger, a renowned player for the Notre Dame football that inspired his squad for years with his determination and work ethic. Hollywood eventually made a motion picture about his exploits and help to inspire thousands of people around the world.

In the following story, Rudy tells a touching story of him and his father and how a certain situation turned his life around…forever.

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Notre Dame is a legendary place. A spot on the team means a chance at great fame. Rudy Ruettiger is a legend himself. He made the Notre Dame class. He then went on to become the heart of the Fighting Irish. His dad, Daniel Ruettiger, was a war hero and legendary dad. 14 kids. Married a world-class mom. Worked three jobs. Yet he always found time to attend his kids’ games.

“Bullied, badgered and mad, I became a rebel in school. Sophomore year it came to ahead. I befriended a rough kid who well could have spelled my end. A big fight was planned for that Friday night. My friend said, ‘Rudy, we’re tough. Let’s go.’

I foolishly agreed. I had a big head. It was a chance to show off. I’d smear those kids who had made me so mad.

I waited until the family was fast asleep. Quietly, I slid out of bed, pulled on my clothes, and tiptoed to the back door. I was careful not to make a sound.

Dad knew something was up. He cut me off at the door. With his hand on my shoulder, he insisted we talk.

I admitted where I was headed. The kids we would fight had belittled us. It was our turn to teach em’ some stuff.

That’s when Dad rescued my future, and maybe my life. He replied, ‘You are no man when a meaningless fight is your way. You become a man by knowing when to walk away. Learn it now and remember.’

I’m blessed that Dad stayed up to catch me that night. Bad news came the next day. Several were badly hurt in the fray. With a blow to the head, my friend was now dead.

It could have been me, or I might have been cuffed and taken away. Either way, that would have spelled the end of my dream – no Notre Dame.

Dad, you were the best: You taught me to stop the big talk; to get in life’s game, then go out and fight to make the big plays. You taught me to know when to walk away.”

By: Rudy Ruettiger

“Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.” ~  Proverbs 1:8

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Time for Tissues!! A Time for Family

Photo Credit: Hans via Pixabay

Photo Credit: Hans via Pixabay

I always find it sort of strange how fast or slow time can actually go. Sometimes, it can go agonizingly slow, like waiting for a bus or a train at a terminal. There are also some instances when time can speed by us at an incredible rate of speed. My grandma used to always say, “the older you get, the days get longer and the years get shorter”…how true it is!!

Have you ever noticed, as a parent, how fast has gone (or is going)? Sometimes we are so busy with our daily schedules that we can easily get distracted and lose focus on our most important things in our lives…our kids.

We all need to take the time to REALLY spend with our children each and every day. The opportunity we have to strengthen their lives and encourage them is an awesome and beautiful responsibility.

This video is a tremendous example of the wonderful and loving relationship between a dad and his daughter…and yes, you will need a box of tissues!!

There is nothing more beautiful than the love that a child and their parents share with each other. The following video is a great testament to this fact.

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The Greatest Day of His Life

Photo Credit: Oakley Originals via CC Flickr

Photo Credit: Oakley Originals via CC Flickr

Time…it is a valuable thing to all of us. The thing that is unlike anything else about time, is that once you experience each small sliver of time or once it is upon you, you can never get it back. You can never buy back time or get a “do-over.”

It is for these reasons that we should all value each bit of time that we have each day. We shouldn’t use our time foolishly or waste it worrying about things that may never happen or dwell on the negative things in life.

We should always focus on living our lives and spending our time with others with one thought: no regrets. I think one of the worst things that a lot of people do is look back on their lives and regret the times or things that they did or didn’t do with someone.

So, when I discovered today’s video, it not only made me a little misty-eyed, but it also reminded me of the importance of time…how we spend it with ourselves and more importantly…how we spend it with our family and friends.

One word of warning…a box of tissues may be needed 🙂

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That SPECIAL Mother and Child Relationship…Beyond Words

This new video shows that special bond that children have with there mothers. The fascinating thing about this video…is how much the child not only knows their mother’s touch but also their smell…all while being blindfolded.

It is truly a very beautiful testament of the love and relationship that children share with their mother. It also demonstrates how much our little ones REALLY know their moms.

Get a box of tissues ready!!

Happy Mother’s Day Everyone!!!!

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One More Time Daddy?

Photo Credit: Tammy McGary via CC Flickr

Photo Credit: Tammy McGary via CC Flickr

While at the park one day, a woman sat down next to a man on a bench near a playground.  “That’s my son over there,” she said, pointing to a little boy in a red sweater who was gliding down the slide.  “He’s a fine looking boy” the man said. “That’s my daughter on the bike in the white dress.”

Then, looking at his watch, he called to his daughter. “What do you say we go, Melissa?”  Melissa pleaded, “Just five more minutes, Dad. Please? Just five more minutes.”  The man nodded and Melissa continued to ride her bike to her heart’s content. Minutes passed and the father stood and called again to his daughter. “Time to go now?”

Again Melissa pleaded, “Five more minutes, Dad. Just five more minutes.”  The man smiled and said, “OK.”  “My, you certainly are a patient father,” the woman responded.

The man smiled and then said, “Her older brother Tommy was killed by a drunk driver last year while he was riding his bike near here. I never spent much time with Tommy and now I’d give anything for just five more minutes with him. I’ve vowed not to make the same mistake with Melissa.  She thinks she has five more minutes to ride her bike. The truth is, I get Five more minutes to watch her play.”

Life is all about making priorities, and family is one and only priority on top of all other, so spend all time you can with loved ones.

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Source: My buddy Karina @ http://karinasussanto.wordpress.com/2013/05/22/five-more-minutes/

 

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One Hundred Dollars An Hour!!

Photo Credit: Steven Depolo via CC Flickr

Photo Credit: Steven Depolo via CC Flickr

There are some times in our everyday lives that we become so busy with things like work or our careers, that we can quite often spend less time with the things that are really important. Today’s story gives us a great illustration of this life principle.
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SON: “Daddy, may I ask you a question?”
DAD: “Yeah sure, what is it?”
SON: “Daddy, how much do you make an hour?”
DAD: “That’s none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?”
SON: “I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?”
DAD: “If you must know, I make $100 an hour.”
SON: “Oh! (With his head down).
SON: “Daddy, may I please borrow $50?”

The father was furious.

DAD: “If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I work hard every day for such this childish behavior.”

The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.

The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy’s questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?

After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think:

Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $ 50 and he really didn’t ask for money very often. The man went to the door of the little boy’s room and opened the door.

DAD: “Are you asleep, son?”

SON: “No daddy, I’m awake”.

DAD: “I’ve been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier. It’s been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here’s the $50 you asked for.”

The little boy sat straight up, smiling.

SON: “Oh, thank you daddy!”

Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills. The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.

DAD: “Why do you want more money if you already have some?”

SON: “Because I didn’t have enough, but now I do.

“Daddy, I have $100 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.”

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness. It’s just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts. Do remember to share that $100 worth of your time with someone you love? If we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family and friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than to our family.

Some things in life are more important….

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The Love Monster

Photo Credit: Ingrid Taylar via CC Flickr

Photo Credit: Ingrid Taylar via CC Flickr

There are many times throughout of lives that we can lose focus on the most important things in our lives and direct our attention on things that may seem more important. It was once said that the most important things in life aren’t seen…the following story is a heartwarming illustration of this idea.

A few summers’s ago, a man decided to take his wife and his precious little 5 year old daughter, along with him on a business trip to an exotic land. He had been searching for a job for many months and plans were made to meet an executive of a very well-known company for a job interview. The future looked promising, for the possibility of receiving an offer from the company would give the man and his family financial security for a long time.

The little family arrived at their destination and to their surprise, the hotel in which they were going to stay was on a very beautiful beach…even more delightful and exquisite than they ever imagined.

They quickly changed into their bathing suits, gathered their beach chairs, towels, blankets and umbrella and made their way to the turquoise sea as fast as they could. For the rest of the day, they all laughed and enjoyed themselves splashing in the water, swimming, body surfing and making sandcastles…what a glorious day it was!!!

The next morning, while his family was still sleeping, the man went down to the outdoor café to meet the business executive for the big meeting. Excited and anxious, the father met the company rep and they soon began their discussion….

A short time later, in the hotel, after eating their breakfast, the mother and little girl got ready for another visit to the white sandy beach.

After playing in the water and sand for a while, the little girl told her mom that she needed to use the bathroom.  She told her mom that she knew where it was and that she would come right back.

On the way to the restroom, the little girl noticed a big chain-linked fence that had a big sign on it with a picture. It was a picture of a black skull and cross bones with a red circle with a line through it covering the images. On the other side of the fence was a beautiful green pond. She had never seen water so green and it was covered with green stuff which looked like clovers.

“Aren’t four leave clovers lucky?” she thought to herself. “I am going to climb that fence, swim around in that stuff and cover myself from head to toe with that green goop.”

Once over the fence and immersing herself in the slimy liquid, she covered herself from head to toe with the green stuff. She grabbed handfuls of the matter and stuffed it into her bathing suit. “Wow! This is fun!” she thought. “I am now the luckiest girl in the whole world!”

Then suddenly, with a smile growing on her little face…she had an awesome plan!

Meanwhile, at the beach, the little girl’s mother noticed that her daughter had been gone for much too long, got worried, left the beach and started frantically looking for her. Her fear mounted and grew each minute as everywhere she looked, her daughter just couldn’t be found. No one had seen her anywhere.

Suddenly, she heard a scream as she saw her little girl land on the ground in front of the fence of the contaminated pond. The girl got up screaming and made an unusual, creepy sound that touched the deepest part of the mother’s heart. As the mother yelled the girl’s name, the little child seemingly ignored her mom’s calls and started running as fast as she could to the hotel’s eating area.

At the café, things were really starting to look very promising for the father. The discussions with the business executive had gone very well and with excitement and expectations growing, his anticipation of finally landing the big job was beyond belief.

All of a sudden, from behind him, he heard his wife calling his little girl’s name in a frightened voice and his daughter’s terrifying screams and growls approaching him. The look on the executive’s face was that of horror and unbelief as he watched the rapidly approaching creature come up to the father from behind.

 

Stunned and turning around in his chair the green creature instantly attacked the father, gave him a bone-crushing hug, instantly splattering the green slime all over the executive’s Taylor-made suit. The little gremlin started covering him with kisses, and said over and over again, “I love you! I love you! I love you!” “I AM THE LOVE MONSTER!”

The infuriated business executive snarled at the little girl “Alright! That’s enough! Your time is over!” Then he barked at the dad, “tell your daughter that her time is over and to leave us alone!!!”

With all of the love and compassion that a father could ever have in his heart, he smiled down at his dear little Love Monster, scooped her up in his arms, then said to the executive…I am sorry sir, but YOUR TIME IS OVER.

And with that, while carrying his beautiful little daughter, took his wife’s hand, and walked away…the happiest man in the world.

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What are your priorities? What are the important things to you? What are the “things” that make you REALLY happy? The choice is yours!

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Author: Rich Muller

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A Shocking Letter to Dad

Photo Credit: Muffet via CC Flikr

Photo Credit: Muffet via CC Flikr

A while ago, I came across a story, which was posted by MumbaiiteAnuletter, about a letter that a daughter had written to her father. As a dad myself, I just couldn’t imagine the millions of thoughts that went through this father’s mind as he read it. I also believe that I would have felt the same way that he did by the time he finished reading the letter!

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A father passing by his teenage daughter’s bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made and everything was neat and tidy.

Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center of the pillow.
It was addressed “Dad”. With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:

“Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you, but I’m leaving home. I had to elope with my new boyfriend Randy because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.
I’ve been finding real passion with Randy and he is so nice to me. I know when you meet him you’ll like him too – even with all his piercing, tattoos, and motorcycle clothes. But it’s not my only the passion Dad, I’m pregnant and Randy said that he wants me to have the kid and that we can be very happy together.
Even though Randy is much older than me (anyway, 42 isn’t so old these days is it?), and has no money, really these things shouldn’t stand in the way of our relationship, don’t you agree?

Randy has a great CD collection; he already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. It’s true he has other girlfriends as well but I know he’ll be faithful to me in his own way. He wants to have many more children with me and that’s now one of my dreams too.
Randy taught me that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone and he’ll be growing it for us and we’ll trade it with our friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we’ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Randy can get better; he sure deserves it!!

Don’t worry Dad, I’m 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I’m sure we’ll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.
Your loving daughter,
Rosie.”

At the bottom of the page were the letters ” PTO” (Please Turn Over).
Hands still trembling, her father turned the sheet, and read:

PS:
“Dad, none of the above is true. I’m over at the neighbor’s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that’s in my desk center drawer. Please sign it and call when it is safe for me to come home.
I love you!
Your loving daughter,
Rosie”

Our children are precious to us. Let’s take the time, each day, to spend time with children and let them know how much we honestly love and care for them!

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Last Dance

There is nothing more beautiful in the world than the relationship between a daughter and her father. This video will touch your heart in a special way and make you realize the how special and wonderful a relationship between a parent and their children should be. We should all value the time that we have with our parents and appreciate everything that they do for us before our gift of time ends. Please note….tissues may be required!

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